I am giving up!
Years ago I had a recurring vision of my soul as a shattered window in an old pane; a form of myself that held the fragmented glass in place -BECAUSE – too much pressure caused the pieces to fall to the ground – and someone will just come along and sweep up the broken pieces in a dust pan and toss in the trash.
But that was a long time ago and I have since become a whole person.
Have I? I’m still trying to hold myself together for what? Fear of being forgotten, tossed in the trash, a constant wannabe? At least as a shattered window people can see through my vision into the world, though there may be fractures of communication.
The window pane. (The window pain). Holds together shattered, broken glass. Why? Because that is it’s purpose?
No. It’s purpose is to hold a window in place. It’s okay for the fragments to fall out.
Let the fragments fall. I’m giving up.
I’m not a shattered glass holder any longer.
I am like a pelican of the wilderness; I am like an owl of the desert. I lie awake, and I am like a sparrow alone on the house top.
He shall regard the prayer of the destitute, and shall not despise their prayer.
A pelican needs water and fish to survive, and thrives near oceans; An owl Is a predator and needs to hunt other animals, needs to nest in trees or rocks and would not survive in an open desert where it can be seen as food.
Sparrows are social birds and gather in colonies or even small groups.
Have you ever felt as if your needs were not met or that you were open season to your enemy, or have you felt you were alone way too long?
The idea here is the feeling of “way too long.”
One of the greatest traps of the enemy is to believe there is no way out and no answer is coming.
Most of my reading this morning was about our tears being food for us, and our tears speaking to us and taunting us “where is your God?”
The danger is not that we feel this way, but that we look to the world for help rather than trust God and his word. He will always answer, he will always provide, his mercy endures forever, and his answer to you will not be filled with shame; but with love and dignity. He will not despise your prayer.
Though He tarry He will surely come.