While strolling through the Psalms this morning, I was stopped here. I read through in one version then in another, not really sure what I am supposed to see.
No, I don’t feel as close to God these days – at least when compared with earlier days.
No, I don’t feel as filled with delight and wonder as I did over a decade ago.
I could think of all kinds of reasons why I don’t, but none seem to be “it.”
Except one. One thing drags me down farther than anything else. My lame feet. I literally have lame feet. Filled with arthritis and pain, nerve shocks that lift me off the ground when I walk and toward the end of the day cause my legs to be so heavy I cannot lift them.
Okay two things – but I can’t write this publicly. God knows the pain of loneliness that can only be remedied with a companion to talk to. I don’t mean friend or counselor. I mean companion. What happened to my companion?
Well maybe there is another. CompanionS. And I cannot be public with that either. God knows.
Then I think “If only my feet and legs would work, none of this would matter. I have resources and skills and talents. My own work would praise me like the Proverbs 31 woman’s works praised her!”
But my feet and legs don’t work and I am filled with struggle day in and day out.
“ReMember Me” I hear Him say
“ReMember Me in the cool of the day”
“ReMember Me with each step you take”
“ReMember Me for the Kingdom’s sake”
“I will ReMember You”
This is deeper than just thinking of Him.
Those words “ReMember Me” have to do with healing of my own body, and healing of His.
Body parts cannot act independently of themselves without getting cut off at the knees.
I cried out to God with my voice—
To God with my voice;
And He gave ear to me.
2 In the day of my trouble I sought the Lord;
My hand was stretched out in the night without ceasing;
My soul refused to be comforted.
3 I remembered God, and was troubled;
I complained, and my spirit was overwhelmed. Selah
4 You hold my eyelids open;
I am so troubled that I cannot speak.
5 I have considered the days of old,
The years of ancient times.
6 I call to remembrance my song in the night;
I meditate within my heart,
And my spirit makes diligent search.
7 Will the Lord cast off forever?
And will He be favorable no more?
8 Has His mercy ceased forever?
Has His promise failed forevermore?
9 Has God forgotten to be gracious?
Has He in anger shut up His tender mercies? Selah
10 And I said, “This is my anguish;
But I will remember the years of the right hand of the Most High.”
11 I will remember the works of the Lord;
Surely I will remember Your wonders of old.
12 I will also meditate on all Your work,
And talk of Your deeds.
13 Your way, O God, is in the sanctuary;
Who is so great a God as our God?
14 You are the God who does wonders;
You have declared Your strength among the peoples.
15 You have with Your arm redeemed Your people,
The sons of Jacob and Joseph. Selah
16 The waters saw You, O God;
The waters saw You, they were afraid;
The depths also trembled.
17 The clouds poured out water;
The skies sent out a sound;
Your arrows also flashed about.
18 The voice of Your thunder was in the whirlwind;
The lightnings lit up the world;
The earth trembled and shook.
19 Your way was in the sea,
Your path in the great waters,
And Your footsteps were not known.
20 You led Your people like a flock
By the hand of Moses and Aaron.